A November of Gratitude: Final Week

by Heather Stillufsen

Typical of my character, I have waited until the last minute to finish with my list of things that I'm grateful for.  My apologies for the delay, but I enjoyed my Thanksgiving with my boys to the fullest, and slacked on everything else!  And so, the day AFTER the end of November, my treasures.  I find that I do love what I have and therefore have what I need.

Treasures

This list had to be on its own, as the items didn't really fall into the other categories, per se.  I certainly don't think I'm a jewelry girl, but it so happens that several of them fall in that group.  But, I have to admit, it's not for materialistic reasons, as one would assume.  They are simply special to me for what they are, as the others listed here.

1. "Push Gift"

So, I'm not Kim Kardashian (and her $1 million diamond choker).  Not even close.  I'm not really even a big jewelry girl.  I never demanded a "push gift," nor did I expect one.  However, this necklace is one of the best gifts that I've received.
Almost two years ago today, I found myself in a hospital bed, numb from the waist down, hooked to monitors, anxiously awaiting the arrival of our first child.  When he finally arrived, I was left a puddle, albeit blissfully happy.  An hour or so later, we were sharing our sweet boy with our parents, waiting to move out of labor and delivery.  My mother-in-law came over to hug me and gave me a small white box.  She explained that when my husband was born, and they had very little money, my father-in-law wanted to give her something to mark the occasion of the birth of their first child.  This was well before anyone coined the term "push gift."  In turn, she wanted to pass it on to me to mark the birth of Jordan's and my first child.  Crying ensued beyond my control once again, as I was truly touched.  Each time I put the necklace on, I'm proud to be his wife and Colin's mom, but also to be a part of their family.

2. Grandma's Pin


I am very lucky to have had the privilege of enjoying time with three out of four of my grandparents growing up.  We all so looked forward to time spent with them and I cherish the memories we made visiting historic battlefields, twisting our own pretzels in Amish country, watching the bug zapper on summer nights, walking to the library listening to cicadas, giving living room fashion shows, and "working" in our homemade doctor's office complete with office supplies and forms.
We continue to make great memories with my mother's parents when we go back to Philly with Colin and those are just icing on the cake for me.  But, in 2002, we lost my sweet Grandma (my dad's mother) to cancer.  The time we spent saying goodbye to her was a very difficult time, but I do remember one moment that I'm so thankful for;  Grandma loved jewelry and had some to match every outfit.  After she passed away, my aunt wanted to be sure that each of us were able to find pieces that were special to us to keep.  There were several pieces that I tucked away, but one in particular that I knew each of us would cherish having; a simple ceramic pin, with her name painted on it.  I held on to it for years until the first one of us got married.  On her wedding day, I gave it to my sister to wear so that Grandma would be there with her.  As each of us has gotten married, we've kept up the tradition and carried her with us.  And, while my mother's parents weren't able to make the trip for my wedding, I was sure to call them just before our ceremony so that they were with me.  And of course, Grandma was with me too, even in my pictures, through the simple, beautiful pin that she once wore.   I keep the pin in my vanity as a constant reminder that she is with me.

3. Wedding Bands

Most would assume that the engagement ring would be any girl's favorite.  Not so for me.  Now, my engagement ring is stunning, without doubt (see the picture in the above item), but I adore my wedding band.  We all know that wedding bands are symbols of unending love.  There is no question how much I love my husband, but what's so great about our wedding bands is the constant reminder.  I find that whenever I look down at my hand and see it, I can be in that moment, holding hands with him in front of God and everyone we love, promising to love him forever.  I love that he picked mine out himself, knowing my tastes.  I love the simplicity and how it compliments my engagement ring.  And I absolutely love looking down at his hand and seeing his and knowing that it ties him to me.  Not as a brand, but a constant promise of my love for him.

4. Mall Madness

Ok, stop laughing.  This is more of a symbolic treasure, folks.  Not that the game isn't delightful (as evidenced by the looks on both of our faces) or remotely unappreciated, because I assure you, it currently resides in my bonus room alongside our other games and comes into rotation to this day.  However, this game is meant to represent ALL of the games that I grew up playing with my sisters.  We had so much fun together and I'm so blessed to have those memories.  Of course, we all still play games together today, though they're more adult and often accompanied by alcoholic beverages.  But the treasure lies in the imagination and the connection.  I see it with Colin already, while he plays with his trucks and constantly asks "Mama p[l]ay too?"  I can't wait to give him a sibling to connect with and pretend with.  Such a treasure is irreplaceable and I am so thrilled to have that with my sisters to this day.

5. The Heimlich Manuever

Y'all, learn this!  Seriously.  There's a reason it's on this list.  I am forever grateful to Dr. Henry Heimlich and his abdominal thrusts, first described in 1974.  It is life-saving.

Two years ago, at Thanksgiving, we were joking around in my parents' kitchen while my dad carved the turkey, as he's done my entire life.  Since we're always goofing around, we all assumed that when dad motioned that he was choking, it was an act, so we all did the requisite "pat, pat" on his back.  To our horror, this was no joke and the back patting was doing nothing.  I'm not sure if it was fear, or the lack of color in Dad's face, but we were all frozen.  With one exception, my husband, Jordan.  As he works with children, he is required to be certified in first aid and CPR.  Out of nowhere, he simply got behind my dad and began the abdominal thrusts that quickly dislodged the piece of turkey on which he had been choking.  I'm not sure if it was pregnancy emotion or sheer terror, but that moment has stuck with me.  You never know what can happen and you should never take for granted how educating yourself can save someone's life.  So thank you, Dr. Heimlich (and Jordan) for your precious gift.

6. Irish Heritage

I think at this point, we're all mostly "mutts."  I mean, i think we can agree that America as a melting pot has certainly been fulfilled.  I do not count myself out of that collective pot at all.  And with a maiden name like Zebrowski, I absolutely would not deny my Polish heritage.  But, both sides of my family are also rich in Irish heritage.  I grew up taking pride in that and entering doorways that were adorned with "Céad Mile Fáilte" (a hundred thousand welcomes).  My relatives have always spoken in Irish blessings, worn claddaghs and of course, their green.  And, on my mother's side of the family they have visited our ancestor's castle in County Cork, Ireland; Castle Donovan.  The castle dates back to the 1640's and still remains today.  I am certainly proud to call myself a descendant of these rich backgrounds and thankful that the traditions are a part of me!

As I've said before, diving into the things you are grateful for is eye-opening.  As humans, we tend to dwell on the things that are keeping us down.  What a refreshing and fulfilling experience this last month was, in discovering the abundant blessings in my life and sharing them with all of you.  At this time of year, I encourage you to do the same and I guarantee, you will be as happily overwhelmed as I have.  Enjoy the amazing things you have!