A November of Gratitude: Week 3

Thanks for coming back to see what this third week of Gratitude means to me.  As stated, ALWAYS something, we just have to remind ourselves what those things are sometimes.

Intangibles
Often it's said that the things we need the most are those that aren't actually "things."  I fully subscribe to this notion.  I do think that this list is one that was probably easier now that I am a little older and have experienced a bit more of life.  Not that I have it all figured out, cause that is an insane notion, however I do think age gives perspective.  Damn it, my parents were always right.

1. Health

This is rather a general statement, and is meant to be, for the most part.  I am aware that perfect health is not reality, however general good health is not a blessing that everyone is necessarily blessed with.  I am definitely a hypochondriac and try to remain on top of anything that worries me.  And, while I don't really eat as healthy as I should, or exercise (mostly ever), I am very thankful for my own, my family's and friends good health.

2. Education

My love for education started early, in my days as a student at Elsmere Elementary School, in Delmar New York.  This school left not only an educational imprint on me, but also gave me lessons socially and emotionally.  The sign reads, "A Place to Love and Grow," and this is no exaggeration.  I formed lifetime bonds there and it felt like family, and that may have been one of the most important lessons I received there.  I will take it with me always and invite you to enjoy the school song we all still know every word to, "Elsmere School Song."  It still makes me choke up.

My love affair kind of meandered through middle and high school, but picked up again fully in college.  I think it was because I realized that for the first time, I controlled what I was learning and it was all leading me to what I wanted to be.  Imagine my dismay when transferring from New York to Georgia completely obliterated my chances of earning my teaching degree after five years of busting my butt.  OH, and the tuition to go along with it!  What amazes me to this day is that despite this rather unfortunate challenge, I realize that I really did take so much from my time at each (yes, three) school; the courses themselves, some of the best friends of my life, leadership roles (as an RA), how to party (CORTLAND), a bit of who I am and wanted to be and especially that none of this can be taken away from me, degree on the wall or no!

Beyond college, my interests really came to light and led me to getting my certification and post-nominal letters (I.E.W.P - aka International Event and Wedding Professional) in Event Planning.  Turns out, this is my true love and the more I learn about it, the more enthralled I become.

I even continue to learn about the field I'm in currently.  Though it's not my dream career, I still love becoming more educated about it.

3.  Work

As I've said previously, my day job is not what I dreamed of doing, while I went to school for all those years.  However, I am quite lucky for what I have there.  The work itself is pretty straight-forward and I have to say, I'm learning from the best.  I've been here eight years this Winter and have formed some amazing relationships.  My boss and co-workers are women I consider friends and  really look up to.  Our lunches have grown into these unbelievable (mostly womens') therapy sessions and I value that so highly.  These women get me through tough times and make me laugh, and give great advice.  I'm also thankful to be able to have the flexibility of hours that I do.  As any working mom will tell you, it can be heartbreaking to leave your babies every day.  It doesn't get any easier, but it does make you cherish the time you do have with them.  So, I wake up at the crack of dawn and bring my butt to work by 6:15, so I can haul it home to Col as soon as 3:30 hits.  I can also thank my day job for getting bills paid, and covering my sweet family for benefits.  

4. Mistakes

Another one you might ask...WHAT?!  No one is perfect.  And I am certainly not.  But the beauty of mistakes is that you learn from them.  All of the reading that I'm doing for kids Colin's age says that they're learning so much right now, but that everything they do is a test.  Whether they're testing their balance, a new food or your patience, they are not doing it to deliberately make you mad.  They are trying to learn limits.  Isn't that essentially the same thing that we are doing when we make mistakes??  I mean, for the most part, we know or have an inkling that they're wrong, but we test it.  The way to make your mistakes is to really use them as tools to guide you to what is right and/or what was meant for you.  I may have regrets, but they are why I'm me and why I have what I do and that is something to be very grateful for.

5. OCD

(Obsessive Compulsive Disorder)

So this is a biggie for me.  Not that my OCD defines me, but it is a large part of me.  Oddly enough, it does change as I do, but it will always be there.  Tons of people have OCD tendencies and thoughts, but when it begins to interfere with your life, the diagnosis is made.  Above you can see some of those tendencies.  I relate to six of seven, in addition to odd little personal quirks.   For me, diagnosis was at age 12.  Sounds crazy, but it's true.  And as the brilliant Eliza Bayne tweeted, it can be started at a very young age.  And while the first years were rough, through therapy and different medications, I've learned to mostly control it and live a normal life.  It's especially difficult during stressful times, including postpartum, which I have read is fairly common (and often accompanied by PPD-great!).  I'm also pretty sure anyone close to me could tell you that I worry more than I should, have to have everything just so, etc.  But I am so grateful for the opportunity to catch myself.  I have learned how to get into my own head and try to solve the issue.  I feel like that is an extremely valuable ability, and though I haven't mastered it entirely, I do notice a change in my being a "neat freak."  As my husband would gladly tell you, there can be inches of dust and dirt on the floor, but if you don't close the cabinets in my kitchen fully, you will pay!  Balance is key :)

6. Creativity

Matisse has always been one of my favorite artists, and this quote shows exactly why.  He started out as a mostly traditional artist for his time, but through the years developed his own unique style that fascinated so many.  And to pull from what he and Einstein said, creative people are "playing" with their "intelligence."  Who doesn't want to spend their time having adventures and doing what makes them happy?  Some of us are not lucky enough to be able to use our creativity at our jobs, but it finds its way out regardless.  And I happen to be of a mind that using your creativity is most certainly not a hobby, but a release that fulfills you.  I am so grateful for any time I have to be creative (especially with my sweet boy), but also for the creative genes I was given!

7. Traditions

Let me start by saying, I'm not a fan of Bob Dylan's.  His voice is the worst.  However, his sentiment is not.  Traditions are one of the things in my life that I value the most.  These are the things that make up who we are and the things that will carry us throughout our lives.  I am beyond thankful for the foundations that our parents gave us and hope that we can build from those an equally strong foundation for our children.  I cherish my memories of Christmas cookie baking, annual Christmas pictures with candy canes and smocked dresses, Rudolph visiting during mass and leaving our Christmas PJs, and coming downstairs Christmas morning by order of age.  Now, all of the traditions that I grew up with did not exist only at Christmas, but those are coming to mind, as that time of year quickly approaches.  But, my parents gave us this unconditional love of family and how important they are to you as well.  I think that's why, as I'm starting my own, it's often stressful to do things the "right way."  I want Colin to have strong traditions with us and grow up and strive for that with his own family one day.

Ok, Admiral, I get it.  Change is good.  I don't disagree, but as Mr. Dylan stated in his whiny, nasal voice, you can't get the memories back.  That's why they're memories.  So, it may be dangerous to hang on to some traditions, but some will remain sacred for me, as will the memories that make them so important.

8. Faith

Ah, the simple Catholic meal time prayer that I grew up with.  As above, a tradition, but we come to learn that it's a building block for so much more.

I doubt whether anyone would tell you that I'm a super-devout person.  I had a Catholic upbringing with church on Sunday (which we usually whined about), regular catechism, and all of my sacraments were made. I was blessed to be baptized with amazing godparents who will always hold a special place in my heart, not only for their guidance in the Catholic faith, but also the bond that I feel it has given us.  

my godfather, Chip

my godmother, Deb

But beyond my immediate family and godparents, I also attended mass with my grandparents.  I listened to stories of them taking our parents and making their First Communion, and that stuck with me.  Learning what they learned, as they had so many years before really resonated with me.  I saw the kind of people they were and knew that I wanted to be as they were with God.  Even when my grandmother nodded off during the homily, as I've seen my Dad do since, I knew that being there and listening to His words was important.  

I was blessed again when my first niece, Nora was born.  My sister and brother-in-law asked me to be her godmother and I could not have been more proud.  Knowing the important role that mine had played made me feel how imperative it would be for me to continue to grow my relationship with God, to set an example for this sweet new life.  That sweet girl stole my heart from day one, so I know that special bond is there too!  And while I have always felt that my relationship with God was strong in my heart and my daily communication, I knew it was time to reapply the knowledge and memories that I grew up with.  

Nora's Baptism my sweet goddaughter, Nora Clare In recent years, I have definitely not attended as well as I should, which did not help my case when I informed my Presbyterian fiance that I intended our marriage to be a sacrament for me.  It may sound far-fetched for a modern Catholic to want that, but my background and connection to my faith compelled me and I didn't feel like it would be right to dismiss that.  Many people, these days have a somewhat skewed idea of what Catholicism is, myself included in some respects.  This post helps lay it all out, and some of the points are exactly what I find myself defending regularly.  Now, I may not know all books of the Bible verbatim, but I know the stories and the meaning.  And as for the "works" or sacraments, well in my heart, those are reaffirmations of my faith, not keys to the big white gates.  They are important to me, as is worship to Presbyterians, in laying out your beliefs and faith at God's feet.  Christians may all have different ways to interpret the word, but knowing the importance of God in our lives is the key.  I'm so thankful that I was given the gift of this relationship and that I am able to trust in it fully. Ok, heavier ending there than I intended, sorry about that!  But we have to be grateful for everything we count close to our hearts!  I will be going a bit lighter for the final installment in my November of Gratitude.  Next week I will share the "treasures" in my life that hold special meaning for me.  Come on back and join me with what you treasure!